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"Crabrighton" (Slime Fiction)

- by Łukasz Kowalczuk, 26 July 2018

Slime Fiction is a series of short (from half a page to several pages long) stories about wrestlers, crabs, monsters, aliens and all kinds of things that make this world a beautiful place. Created by Łukasz Kowalczuk. Proudly hosted by Trash Mutant.
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The policeman tried to throw a punch, but his head fell off his shoulders and rolled across the boardwalk.
 
Click-clack, click-clack.
A pair of pincers hung over the uniformed blood fountain. Rocker Ted, who was just about to get smacked with a baton, gawped as if hypnotized at the giant crab scrambling over the balustrade.
 
-Get the fuck out of there! – The shout was like a slap in the face. Elegant, Ted’s worst enemy, the leader of the South End mods, was waving a deck chair in n front of him, warding off one of the beasts. – There’s a fuckton of them, one is eating my fucking scooter! – The sight of the crab, chewing a brand-new Vespa, would delight Ted, if it weren’t for the fact that his bicycle was next in line. When the blood from the corpse of the torn-apart cop spurted all over him, Ted realized that the bikes were the least of their problems. The only real plan was to get the fuck out, sharpish.
 
Click-clack, click-clack.
More crabs were walking out of the scarlet sea. The pincered squadron brought death and destruction. Only seagulls sensed danger and disappeared before the massacre began. A real feast awaited them at the beach, made up of human remains. The mutated crustaceans had no trouble getting over the barrier and a couple dozen of the beasts were wreaking havoc all along the boardwalk. Ted and Elegant ran to the nearest shop. When they saw what was happening outside, it was too late to run. They, a couple of tourists and the shop owner just looked out in horror at the nightmare outside. When the last victim stopped screaming, a quiet fell over the resort, for the first time in many years.
 
Click-clack, click-clack.
The leader of the monsters, a pink-and-green colossus, started towards the main street. Suddenly, a Coke can burst open on his carapace.
-That’s it! Come on you maggots! I will fuck you up, fucking bugs! – screamed Ted. Elegant stood right next to him with a broken bottle in hand. The rest of the people also left the shop, all carrying makeshift weapons.
-Get the fuck out, this is our town! We will fight at the beaches, in the fields, on the streets, we will fight on the hills; we will never surrender! – Ted ran out of breath, but Elegant came to his aid.
-Never mind what gang we’re from or what football club we support. I don’t give a fuck about skin color or religion, we will be united! I don’t care…- But the crabs cared even less. A minute or so of slicing and dicing the group of survivors were just so much minced meat and bones.
 
Click-clack, click-clack. Click-clack, click-clack.
It sounded a bit like “Jailhouse Rock”, and a bit like “My Generation”.


​
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Translated to English by Grzegorz Gołębski.
Art by Łukasz Kowalczuk.



What did you think of the battle of Crabrighton? Leave your comments below!

Tagged: Slime Fiction.


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