3 "Superman VS..." Movies I Have To SeeJust in case you’ve been staying away from the internet, film, radio and every other type of media under the sun, Superman and Batman recently fought each other in a movie called Batman vs Superman: Dawn of Justice! But Batman and Superman have been on again off again fighting each other since 1986. We want to see Superman fight some other things! So in this article, we will be delving into the other Superman Vs movies we want, nay, NEED to see in the coming years.
Superman vs Harry Potter: Dawn of Magic We all know Superman is weak against Magic. But Harry Potter is a youth - his magic isn’t even at its fullest, manliest form yet. So Superman could still whup Harry a little bit before Harry gets in a few spells to stun the Man of Steel! But why are these two heroes fighting? In Superman’s secret identity as Clark Kent, he’s a reporter. And in a Daily Planet/Daily Prophet partnership, Clark Kent is investigating juvenile delinquency at Hogwarts. And who is the poster child for always breaking the rules and never ever getting in trouble? Harry Potter, of course! After his piece exposing the truth on Harry Potter gets buried behind Steve Lombard’s report on the Quiditch Game, Clark is going to let his fists do the talking now. But what does Hermione Granger and Parvati Patil think of their dreamy new Defense against the Dark Arts professor, Clark Kent? Because of a marathon session of kissing everybody in Great Britain with his super kisses [the Amnesia Kisses – see “Superman II” – Ed.], nobody knows he’s investigating juvenile delinquency, and now he’s pretending to be a teacher to spy on Harry up close. Sure, nobody’s ever seen him cast a spell before, but he’s so dang cute and his resume looks more impressive than a few of the other Defense Against the Dark Arts teachers we’ve seen so far. Superman vs Jason vs Predators Superman fights alien invasions all the time, but this one is really, really bad. Brainiac, an alien known for stealing cities from planets and shrinking them down to about 1 foot tall, steals a chunk of the Predator home world seen in the movie Predators. When Brainiac comes to Earth, Superman rescues Brainiac’s collection of cities, because he’s a nice guy, but little does he know that the Predators are still predatory, even if they’re less than an inch tall! While Superman would probably be able to handle tiny Predators who have escaped from the bottle city of Predatoria, he also has to deal with tiny Jason Voorhees, who was launched into space in Jason X, and landed on a duplicate Planet Earth. Yes, that movie was set in the future, but the inhabitants of Earth Two just couldn’t deal with Jason, so they sent him to the past, where he ended up on another world – one where Brainiac shrunk down a city he was in. You might go into this movie thinking that a bunch of threats that are super tiny are no match for someone with the powers of Superman, but you’d be wrong! Because the city of Predators and Jason all have tiny Kryptonite. It’s tiny, so it takes away Superman’s powers in tiny bursts! And that’s really all the advantage these guys need! Superman vs Civil War: Dawn of War Everybody loves Civil Wars! The Marvel Universe is getting into it with a movie this year, Matthew McConaughey is getting into it this year, and we want Superman to get in on it while the getting’s good! But which side will the last son of Krypton join? The North or the South? The Fans will want to know, so they can know which side they support in the social media campaigns leading up to the release of the movie. Well, in an effort to portray both sides equally, Superman will be joining both sides. Not since the 1990s has Superman split up into Superman Red and Superman Blue! But he’s going to do it now, and each half will join opposite sides and it will not only be a war of Brother vs Brother, but a war of Self vs Self! And this movie will finally allow Josh Brolin to reprise his role as the ugly tormented bounty hunter Jonah Hex! But not just the Jonah Hex from this time period! This movie will also have future Jonah Hex who spent some time in a post-apocalyptic future after Crisis on Infinite Earths returning to the cowboy times! Will he be fighting with or against his younger self? You’ll have to watch the movie to find out! Those are just three movies that we really need to have of Superman vs’ing other things and people! But there are others out there! What do you Trash Muties think? Are there any that I should have covered here? Let us know in the comments! And in the meantime, keep it trashy! |
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